stress

The days leading up to Christmas were full of stress.  I got a cold, then must have passed it on the Darrell.  His immune system being what it is, he wound up getting way sicker than me.  By the weekend of December 11, he wasn't eating and coughing like crazy; he had to stay home from the Perry and Price Show because he wasn't well.  Finally on Sunday evening, the 12th, I told him that we had to go to the ER because I had to work the next day, Monday, and there wouldn't be anyone home to take care of him.  He must have been feeling pretty bad by then, because he agreed, and we went to Kuakini ER.  The diagnosis almost immediately was that he had pneumonia, confirmed by the chest xray , high respiratory rate and low oxygen level.  The doctors decided that he needed to be admitted.  I wound up staying with him in ER until 2 am, when they finally told us that they would keep him there overnight since there were no beds available upstairs.  

I wound up having to take the day off from work anyways, since I was up so late and also wanted to stay with him on Monday.  Got a couple of hours sleep and went back in to the hospital.  Luckily Ryan got a parking pass for finals week so he was able to drive himself to school.  Darrell was moved from the ER to PCU (Progressive Care Unit on the 3rd floor, which is in between ICU and regular care).  He had such a hard time breathing all week; he said later that he thought he was going to die.  There was so much fluid in his lungs.  They gave him IV antibiotics to fight the infection and diuretics to drain the fluids.  By Friday, the xrays showed that he was actually worse than when he first came in, so they decided to move him into ICU.  Thank goodness, but by the next day, he was better, and could be weaned off of the oxygen he was being given.  And the next day he was moved into a regular room on the 4th floor.  We just hoped that he could be released to come home by Christmas, and on the 22nd, I got the call that he was going to be released.  He's back on home IV antibiotics but he's much better, and this stay was 10 days, rather than 40 days.

To add to my stress level, work that week was so busy, trying to get things done because my bosses were going to be out of the office for the holidays and I needed to get approvals/signatures.

Ryan was not dealing with Darrell being in the hospital again; he doesn't like to see him that way.  He was also in finals week and working.  When he asked to go to his friend's house in Kahaluu on Saturday night, the 18th, after work, I said ok because he was done with school and I thought it would be good for him to spend time with his friends.  He texted me about 10:45 that night to let me know he was at his friend's house, so I figured he was safe and went to bed.

At about 12:45 am, I was woken up by a call on my cell from a "private number."  I might not have picked up the call, but with Darrell in the hospital in ICU and "private number" usually denoting a call from my sister or aunty, I answered.  The man on the phone verified my name and asked if I was Ryan's mother.  My heart just started beating quicker.  Then he said he was a police officer and had to issue Ryan a ticket for speeding in MILILANI and for driving with his headlights off.  I think I sounded calm, even though my heart started pumping hard and I was thinking "WTF is he doing in Mililani when he was supposed to be safe and sound in Kahaluu?!"  The police officer was very nice to me, saying he was concerned because this incident happened almost exactly where a 19-year-old boy was hit the night before, thrown 40 feet, and killed.  I thanked the officer and called Ryan.  He said one of the friends who was supposed to stay over with them found out he had to go home so Ryan offered to drive him.  To Mililani.  His friend Kaala went along for the ride.  I ordered him to drop Kaala off at his house and come straight home immediately. 

When he got home, he got it from me!  I was still shaken from getting that call.  He had no business driving anywhere without letting me know.  The boy who had to go home should have been picked up by his parents.  Why the hell was he speeding?!  Why the hell did he turn off his lights?!  Did he know what I thought when I got a call from a police officer at almost-one in the morning asking if I had a son named Ryan?!  OMG, nothing good comes from a call in the middle of the night, and I was expecting the WORSE, the kind of call that 19-year-old's parents got the night before.

It's a good thing my dad, who was sleeping in the living room, is kind of hard of hearing, or he would have been woken by a lot of screaming at 3 am.

Ryan said the police officer was mean, swearing at him.  But I told him that he was trying to teach him a lesson, maybe scare him a little, because the consequences could have been disastrous.  He could have gotten his best friend killed, maybe hurt an innocent stranger, maybe get himself killed. 

Don't get me wrong...he's a good kid.  But that's just it, he's still a kid, with not-too-good judgment sometimes.  He figured he was being a good friend and taking the boy home, but he also wanted to drive his car around.  He said he turned off his lights, was amazed at how dark it was, then turned them back on.  Unfortunately he got caught by the police.  Fortunately, he didn't injure anyone during that time.

So he's grounded again, except for driving to work or driving someplace where it's not convenient for me to take him.  Since he's a juvenile, the fine was dropped from $204 to $110.  And he had to pay for that out of his work earnings. 

And that's why I'm glad 2010 is over.  Hopefully 2011 will be a better year for all of us.